Another partially exciting season of Bachelor Pad is in the books, and the finale of ABC's guilty pleasure smash certainly packed in something for everyone.
Who won it all? Who broke up? Who got engaged?
Let's break it all down in THG's final BP recap ...
Kalon McMahon and Lindzi Cox are still together! Plus 20.
Erica Rose, in a desperate attempt to stay relevant, tells Lindzi to be careful because she's spotted Kalon at different events with other women. Minus 10.
Lindzi didn't know what to say or do. So, yeah. Minus 5.
Jaclyn said she was still hurt by being betrayed by her "best friend" Rachel on the last episode, when the latter did not take Jackie and Ed to the finale.
Rachel said Nick pushed to oust them because they would have been a bigger threat, which makes total sense. Jaclyn? Not altogether stable. Minus 50.
Blakeley Shea, or Blakeley Jones, or Blakeley Shea Jones ... whatever she wants to be called, she may not have won the money, but she won in love.
Seriously. She and Tony Pieper are still together! And then some! T-Piep surprised everyone, including his lady, with a proposal on stage! Plus 150.
She said yes, you guys. Obvi. Plus 10.
Then the final four took the stage and there was clearly major tension between Rachel and Michael, who clearly aren't about to pull a Tony-Blakeley.
Mike said he's not looking for a serious long-distance relationship ... but Rachel revealed that she found out Michael in exactly that with someone else.
Plus 50 for Mike being in the hot seat two years in a row on the finale, but this time at least the love of his life isn't getting engaged to another guy.
Chris Bukowski seemed a bit remorseful, having played everyone openly from the start. Not even his family was proud of him, he said. Minus 160.
Therein lies the problem with screwing people over all season. He won enough competitions to make it this far, but votes were in short supply for C.
Rachel and Nick got almost a clean sweep. Plus 40.
Now for the interesting part - or what has the potential to be. In separate rooms, Nick and Rache had to decide to "share" or "keep" the money.
If both choose to split it down the middle, that's exactly what happens with the prize. If one chooses to keep the $250,000, their partner is out of luck.
If both choose to keep it, the money gets dispersed among the rest of the Bachelor Pad housemates and Rachel and Nick walk away with nothing.
It's a big dice roll any way you slice it, but Rachel Trueheart said she wouldn't have gotten this far without her partner and chose to share the cash.
After saying how he got here on his own, Nick decided to KEEP IT FOR HIMSELF. Nick Peterson is your SOLE Bachelor Pad winner, ladies and gentlemen!
Plus 275 for the major brass that took. We'd feel bad for Rache, but no one even acted like Nick was even on the show, and hey, it is a game after all.
You know Chris is giving him props right now. Plus 25.
Rachel was "devastated" and called her partner a "f--king schmuck." Nick clearly did not care, saying she didn't even want to be partners with him.
Sorry Ms. Trueheart. It's the name of the lame game.
EPISODE TOTAL: +335! SEASON TOTAL: -420!
What do you think of Nick Peterson's fast one?
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